ICEBREAKER, a story blog by Michelle

“He got to just be himself, enjoying his bin of shakers, stomping around with his squeaky shoes, and making a few hand motions to his well-loved songs.”

Our family moved in the summer of 2023. 

Moving is hard for any family – hence why many studies list it as the number one most stressful life event. It is even harder when you have a child with special needs. Beyond the stress of packing, living in limbo, and then unpacking, we had to find new specialists, therapists, etc., and a new community. We tried to connect in various ways, but found it hard to plug-in.

We found Starfire shortly after moving, and we decided to host an event in May 2024 after we settled into our new home and had time to meet some people. Our little guy with a disability loves music, and so we decided to make it all about music!

After months of living in our new city, we were feeling starved for relationship after many failed attempts to connect. But we decided to keep on with our musical event. We passed out many invitations, both to acquaintances and near-strangers. We received a few RSVPs, and of those that did RSVP “yes”, one family backed out due to illness. That left us with three committed families.

 To some, that count may seem like a failure. But, it was those three families that made the event amazing, and, because of the event size, it allowed for more authentic connection. Everyone had an absolute blast, we connected with the parent attendees, and there was not one mention of our son’s Down syndrome diagnosis. He got to just be himself, enjoying his bin of shakers, stomping around with his squeaky shoes, and making a few hand motions to his well-loved songs.

Shortly after our event, we were invited by one of our attendees to a summer kick-off party. We were elated! 

“Our son just got to be a little toddler who loved music, and our musical event broke the ice that we could just not otherwise crack.”

Our Family Project was our icebreaker. We didn’t feel like we stuck out like a green thumb, our son just got to be a little toddler who loved music, and our musical event broke the ice that we could just not otherwise crack. We are still in contact with those three families, and we hope those relationships continue to blossom.

Jan Goings